


Five years

by Alisclexa



Category: The 100 (TV) RPF, Unspecified Fandom
Genre: Clexa, F/F, Other, elycia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-26
Updated: 2016-11-15
Packaged: 2018-08-11 04:23:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 16,658
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7876210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alisclexa/pseuds/Alisclexa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alycia and Eliza have been married for nearly 5 years. The 100 got cancelled after six seasons, Eliza just finished her final convention tour for Clarke. Alycia is in India directing her first independent movie. Will this new start damage Eliza and Alycia's relationship ?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Friends

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome back on a newish Elycia fan fic ! The sequel to "Lost in this role", if you haven't read it come back when you did so you'll understand this fic better. For those who followed the first fan fic from the start I hope you'll read this and appreciate it, it's all for you !

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First chapter !   
> The clexa fan fic is coming soon, I'm still working on it... I'm on holidays for a week so I don't really have time to write, please be patient with me ;)

**Alycia's POV**

  


"Cut! Okay it was amazing guys but please I need it to be more real and raw" 

  


I hug my crew and head straight back to my trailer. I see I've got five missed calls from my wife. I smile because I know how worried she must be. 

  


_\- Babe?_

_-Finally! Where have you been? I was so worried.._

_\- Sorry it's pretty hectic here, everything is going so fast, it's just amazing. I wish you could be here._

_\- I miss you Alycia, I just..._

_\- I can't here you... the... bad... Eliza_

_\- What?_

_-I'll call you back later it’s..._

  


I hate this signal, I love this country but I hate that it has to be so far away from her. India as treated me so well since I've arrived two months ago, only one months left before I head back home. 

  


"Leesh can I come in?" 

"Yes of course" 

  


Maia walks inside my small trailer and throws herself on the couch next to me. She breaths heavily, I know our filming schedule is intense and exhausting for her. 

  


"I'm so tired Alycia"

"I know, I'm the same, directing is not that relaxing" 

  


She hands me over the bag of chocolates that was sitting on my table, we both eat our way through it and finally end up crashing on the couch. When I open my eyes again I realize it's now too late for me to call back Eliza. She seemed worried and not that well. I hope she's not alone. I grab my notebook and start writting down what I have to do for the next scenes. 

  


"Gosh Alycia stop working... Wait, you are working for no reason because you have something on your mind?" 

"No... Maybe"

"Tell me" 

"It's Eliza, I'm worried... she's at home alone, she has nothing to do and I'm not there for her"

"Alycia since the show has been canceled she has been a mess, not really a charming person to others, and most of all she told you to do this. She wanted you to live your dream so live it and enjoy." 

"You're right..." 

  


Maia takes me in her arms and we both fall back at sleep for the next couple of minutes before I have to go back on set direct the next scenes of the day. 

  


**Eliza's POV**

  


Once more I check my phone but nothing. I lay back on the couch pretending Game of thrones is my new obsession when all I really want to do is be behind that screen again. I finish the bottle of wine that I had opened an hour ago, I reach my computer and send a Facebook message to Rhys and see if he can come over and keep me company. My phone finally makes a sound; I jump on it and realize it's only my friend saying he will be there in 10 minutes. I drag myself up the stairs and put something decent on. I look like a mess but I know he won't judge me, not in my situation. Back downstairs I realize I've got two missed calls from Alycia. I call her back. 

  


_\- Babe?_

_-Finally! Where have you been? I was so worried.._

_\- Sorry it's pretty hectic here, everything is going so fast, it's just amazing. I wish you could be here._

_\- I miss you Alycia, I just..._

_\- I can't here you... the... bad... Eliza_

_\- What?_

_-I'll call you back later it’s..._

  


Our communication was cut short like always. Luckily Rhys rings at my door. I try not to look so tipsy when he enters. 

  


"Hello my name is Rhys, what have you done with my best friend?" 

"Oh shut up..." 

"It's 8 p.m and you are clearly drunk" 

  


I pour him a glass of whisky so he could catch up on me. We start binge watching some lame show and I realize half way through that I have my head on his shoulder. I've missed the feeling of having someone I can rest on, someone there for me. Unfortunately Rhys gets up and nearly falls which brings me to tears of laughter. 

  


"See I'm not the only drunk here" 

"You drugged me" 

  


I run up to him so I can help him to the bathroom, he clearly can't walk straight anymore. I wait for him leaning against the kitchen isle. I run my fingers through my hair and look out into the garden when I feel a hand on my waist, for a second when I close my eyes I think its Alycia. I turn around and face him. 

  


"You are not feeling well aren't you?"

"How did you guess? Did the early drinking sell me away?" 

"What can I do Eliza tell me..." 

I close my eyes and press my hand against his chest, I feel his heart beating hard, I press my head against him. His strong arms around me make my pain slowly fade away. I grab his shirt in his back, his perfume making me dizzier. He takes my face between his hands and stares deeply into my eyes. 

  


"Liz..." 

  


I can't see clear, I close my eyes and hold him closer. I feel his hands travelling through my hair, just like Alycia does, I remember every touch. It feels so good and soothing that I just want to let go.


	2. Reunion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please do not get mad at me for this story line, it's a bit dramatic yes but it's for a reason so please stick with me and you'll see how I'm going to turn things around !

**Eliza's POV**

  


"Mat please leave, Alycia is going to be here in less than an hour now and I need to be ready" 

"Are you sure you want me to leave?"

"Yes, thank you for helping me get back on my feet... I don't know what I would do without you" 

  


My friend leaves the house after hugging me and making sure I remembered all his advices. Alycia is finally coming back home; I start cooking her favorite meal, my hands are shaking because of the anxiety, I feel noxious, my palms are sweating just with the thought of seeing her again. When the dinner is ready I frenetically look at my phone, the hour is not going by fast enough. After waiting several minutes I sit in front of our swimming pool by the exterior fireplace. The sun is slowly setting, I close my eyes trying to think positively. 

  


"Eliza?" 

  


Her voice. I jump on my feet and start walking fast towards the patio, I see her dropping her bags in the entry. Our eyes finally meet, she starts running and before I can even say something she's in my arms. Her curly hairs are tickling my nose; with my eyes closed I inhale her sent. I can't believe she's next to me. 

  


"I've missed you so much babe. I love you." 

  


I burst into tears. Alycia grabs my face in her long and soft hands. 

  


"Hey... What's going on?"

  


She's still smiling; her beautiful smile and sparkling eyes are blocking me. How can I tell her what I have done. I love her more than anything in this world and I may loose her because of this. I smile back at her. 

  


"I... I just missed you so much."

"Aw babe don't cry for that I'm here now" 

  


I nod before kissing her; when our lips touch I feel all my anxiety and pain fade away. It feels like the first time again. Our embrace is short as I ear her stomach cry. 

  


"Let me guess? You didn't eat anything since you left India?"

"You know me too well Miss Taylor-Carey" 

"I'm glad I made you an Italian chicken marinade like you love it" 

  


She runs towards the kitchen, I join her calmly and serve the dinner. I watch her eat and make those noises of enjoyment. 

  


"So tell me everything that happened here while I was gone?" 

"Tell me about you instead, I want to know everything about India" 

  


Alycia starts talking about her live changing experiences over there, how she loved directing that movie, her new ambitions and dreams. I listen to her carefully, she finishes her second plate before I can finish my first one, I start feeling noxious again and push away my meal. My wife is still talking with passion about her time in India. I start doing the washing up but I quickly feel a hand on my stomach and lips crashing down on the back on my neck causing me to shiver. Alycia turns me around and I can see in her eyes all the love she feels for me. 

  


"I love you my leeshy-loo... I have to tell you something" 

"Yes?" 

  


Her hand on my body and her stare are making me hesitate once more. I know I will have to tell her but right now I can't. 

  


"I'm thinking about working again, auditioning... Mat helped me today with a self tape" 

"That's amazing, I told you you would overcome your fears!"

  


She kisses me with passion, I try to resist, but the temptation is way too strong. I cave into her arms and let her make love to me. 

  


**Alycia's POV**

  


The plane finally lands in L.A. After nearly 24 hours of travel I'm going to be reunited with the love of my life. It's so weird being back in this crazy city, being back home. I quickly get stuck in traffic and remember how reckless and wild was the traffic in India. My American phone back on track I reconnect a bit with social media. I see a lot of paparazzi posts about my friends, I scroll down my feed and see a strange post about Eliza. 

  


_"Rhys spotted outside the Elycia villa at 4 a.m... When Alycia's not home Eliza is having fun!"_

  


I don't really want to pay attention about rumors and paparazzi manipulations. I trust Eliza and Rhys is one of her best friend, he must have been there to comfort her. My driver stops in front of my house. I turn the keys and open the door to a nice smell of home and food. I look around and I can't see any sign of my girl. 

  


"Eliza?" 

  


I drop my heavy suitcases next to the door and start wondering around the entry, I look everywhere as if I was discovering the place for the first time. I smile when my eyes come across one of our many wedding pictures hanging on the wall. When I stare back in front of me I see Eliza standing in the garden. My heart start racing, I start running towards her. I take her in my arms with so much strength I'm afraid I broke one of her ribs. 

  


"I've missed you so much babe. I love you." 

  


I hold on even harder to her, I feel her heart pounding in her chest but I quickly realize she's crying. I take a step back and stare into her eyes, I don't really understand her reaction. 

  


"Hey... What's going on?"

  


I touch her face, swipe away her tears and smile at her to comfort her. Seeing her cry is the worst thing. 

  


"I... I just missed you so much."

"Aw babe don't cry for that I'm here now" 

  


I slowly lean into a kiss and nearly forgot how hungry I am. When my stomach starts screaming my cheeks turn red. I sit at the table and start eating the delicious meal my wife prepared for me. When I ask her about her time alone she doesn't answer which seems weird but I don't really want to ruin our reunion with preoccupations. I start telling her every thing I loved and already miss about India, even if we called each other a lot there's so much things I didn't have time to tell her about. Eliza listens to me with so much attention I think it's adorable. She gets up and starts washing the dishes. Seeing her in this beautiful light summer dress is making me go a bit crazy. I walk up to her and put one of my hands on her stomach, dragging it down her thighs. My other hand pushing away the hairs on her shoulder so I can kiss her neck. In a quick movement I turn her body around so I can face her. I see in her eyes that something is on her mind. 

  


"I love you my leeshy-loo... I have to tell you something" 

"Yes?" 

"I'm thinking about working again, auditioning... Mat helped me today with a self tape" 

"That's amazing, I told you you would overcome your fears!"

  


I'm genuinely happy she's going to get back to work, since all the drama with Jason last year she hasn't even tried to audition for anything. Working will make her complete again I'm sure. I stare at her with pride for a second but I can't resist her lips any longer, I kiss her passionately and grab her thighs bringing her closer to me. At first I feel a strange tension in her body but she finally let's go and deepens the embrace. 


	3. Sick Tension

**Alycia's POV**

  


_\- No Maia I'm not kidding... It's so strange, I feel something’s wrong but I can't find out what_

_\- So you seriously didn't make love to her since the day you came back... I knew lesbian bed death was a thing but I mean wow..._

_\- Yes, well now it's our thing apparently but I want her so bad, she just pushes me away_

_\- Have you asked her why?_

_\- No, I don't want her to think I just want to have sex with her..._

_\- Leesh, talk to her._

_\- She's coming in the room, talk to you later_

  


I hang up the phone and try to take a natural pose in bed. It's quite early in the morning and Eliza has been awake for a long time. She still has problems to find sleep. When she walks into the room she has this "know-it-all" face that I hate. 

  


"Who was it?"

"What?"

"Alycia tell me who was it on the phone"

"Maia"

"And? You seemed to have a really private conversation, so private that you whispered" 

  


I get up and take a deep breath; I know I have to have this talk with her. I'm afraid about her reaction. 

  


"Babe I just needed to talk to her about something bothering me" 

  


Eliza just nods, her arms crossed and her face cold as ice, quite normal lately. 

  


"We... you...I mean babe it's been two weeks and you haven't touched me, we kiss yes but when I try to take it further you push me away, I want to know why." 

"You talked to Maia about our intimate life? Alycia you know how I feel about that" 

"Gosh... Stop making a big deal out of this and just answer the question. Don't you desire me anymore? Have I done something to upset you? Are you mad at me for leaving?" 

  


I see the tears in her eyes, tears I have seen too many times since I'm back. I feel it in my bones something is really wrong with her, something I don’t know is destroying her from the inside and it kills me. 

  


"Of course I desire you, I love you" 

"Then why don't you touch me, why do you push me away... Eliza I know you, you are hiding something"

"I just... I don't want to... I..." 

  


I see her face suddenly turn pale, she runs towards the bathroom and before I can reach her she closes the door. I knock asking how she is and she doesn't answers. I turn my back against the wall and let myself fall on the floor. I don't know why I went bothering her with all those silly things, she's still weak. When Eliza finally walks out the bathroom her eyes are swollen from the tears, she's shaking like a leaf and I can see the pain on her face. She falls on her knees in front of me. I take her into my arms. 

  


"Alycia I'm sorry" 

"It's fine forget what I said... It was stupid" 

  


She stares at me and nods side ways, she swipes away her tears and puts on a desperate smile.

  


**Eliza's POV**

  


I walk back upstairs after taking my early morning breakfast. When I'm about to walk into the bedroom I overhear Alycia whispering to someone. I hide behind the door and listen closely; I hear she's talking about me. 

  


"Something’s wrong...She just pushes me away"

  


As I hear those words I try not to cave into the fear and pain. I put on this mask and drag myself into the room, looking for some kind of conflict that I think will make me feel better about myself. 

  


"Alycia tell me who was it on the phone"

"Maia"

"And? You seemed to have a really private conversation, so private that you whispered" 

  


She walks towards me but I clearly indicate on my face she has to stay away until I have my answer. 

  


"We... you...I mean babe it's been two weeks and you haven't touched me, we kiss yes but when I try to take it further you push me away, I want to know why." 

  


I try to keep a serious face when all I want to do is burst into tears. I love Alycia so much but I can't touch her without hurting. I can't even kiss her without thinking about what I've done. Once more I hide behind easy sentences. I didn't expect Alycia to get mad; she's clearly suspecting something. I try to control my emotions but they’re just too hard to keep in. 

  


"Eliza I know you, you are hiding something"

  


I try to make up so dumb excuse again when all I want to do is scream out the truth but if I do I know the consequences will be unbearable. Before I can even start my sentence I feel sick, I ran towards the bathroom, lock myself and start puking. I feel so noxious and sick lately, my anxiety has been so over the roof that even my body is rejecting my problems. I wash my face and grab a clean towel in the desk, I see a box of tampons and I realize my periods are really late. I start counting, 37 days. My jaw drops and my hands automatically dropped to my stomach. This can't be. I burst into tears as I realize the consequences will be much greater than expected. I drag myself out the room, and collapse in front of Alycia. She takes me in her arms and tries to comfort me but it's too late for that. I have to tell her now. 

  


"Alycia I'm sorry"

"It's fine forget what I said... It was stupid" 

  


I feel overwhelmed but I try to take over my emotions. I feel so stupid and ridiculous. I take a deep breath. 

  


"I'm pregnant" 


	4. The truth

**Alycia's POV**

  


I try to make sense about what she just said but my head starts spinning. I get up and start walking around like a psycho. Eliza is still on her knees crying into her hands. I need explanations, I hate conflict but I can't really control my tone. 

  


"You fucking what? I need explanations Eliza... like right now" 

"I... about a month ago I was a mess, I drank all day and never got out the house"

"I don't care about that jump to the fact" 

"I invited Rhys over... We where drunk and I missed you, he made me feel good and safe, when I closed my eyes I thought I was with you and it felt good." 

  


I don't want to understand what she's telling me. She can't be serious, this must be a joke. I feel like my heart is getting ripped out of my chest. Eliza gets up and tries to reach me but I push her away and walk downstairs. 

  


"I can't believe you did that to me" 

"I love you Alycia, with all my soul and body. What I have done is killing me." 

  


Her words are not affecting me. I grab my jacket on the hanger and car keys on the counter. 

  


"Where are you going?" 

"I need to get the hell out of here" 

"Please don't" 

  


I shut the door behind me and drive like a maniac to Marny's condo. She's the only one in town, Maia is in Vancouver. When my friend opens up her door barely awake I collapse in her arms. She comforts me as I tell her the bomb Eliza dropped on me. 

  


"Wow... I was not expecting that from her. But Alycia...I don't want to seem like I'm defending her 'cause I'm not but didn't you have a strange thing going on with one of the crew members" 

"He flirted with me I didn't invite him in my bed after that. Eliza slept with someone else and she kept it from me for a month. I want a divorce." 

"Alycia stop it you are not thinking clearly. Eliza fucked up big time I agree, but you love her. She loves you and I'm sure of that, if she didn't she would have left you for him or someone else."

"So you believe her story?"

"Yes, don't tell me that when the guy started telling you how beautiful you were didn't make you feel better? Imagine being drunk, needy of attention and missing your wife so bad, with someone giving you what you have been missing for so long wouldn't have made you weak?" 

"Maybe... But Marny I wouldn't have done it..." 

  


Once more my tears take over my speech, I can't take the pain in my chest. Eliza betrayed me in the worst way possible. We both call Maia to update her about the situation and I was not expecting her to tell me to go back to her immediately. I always thought she didn't really appreciated Eliza and now when I give her the opportunity to bring her down she does the opposite. 

  


"I think Maia is right you should go back to her and work things out" 

"Why would I do that? She doesn't deserve my forgiveness"

"I didn't tell you to forgive her, I am telling you that your wife that you love is pregnant. Yes it was maybe not on your plans but she's having a baby. And right now there's a lot of reason for Eliza to make irrational decisions, she needs you." 

  


My mind went straight to dramatic scenarios. Eliza was depressed for a year, I was her rock. I left her and she collapsed, I needed to leave and it was the right decision. What if she does something stupid because of this? I kiss Marny on the cheek but I quickly leave her house and drive back home. I stop the car and jump out of it, I push the front door and run up the stairs but no one, I look out the window on the garden part and no one, I look out to the swimming pool and I see Eliza. I run downstairs and jump the last few stairs. I rush to stop Eliza. I push her away from the side of the pool. 

  


"You scared me so much" 

"What?" 

"Killing yourself will not answer for your betrayal." 

"I didn't... want to kill myself... I took a walk for fresh air" 

  


I hold her even closer. I feel relieved she's still alive and not suicidal. I can't live without her even if right now I hate her I also know I love her more. In the bathroom, I help her dry herself and as my hands wonder around her body I end up having them on her stomach. She stops shaking and stares at me. I stare at her stomach and for the first time of the day I realize she's really pregnant. I storm out the room. 

  


**Eliza's POV**

  


Alycia storms out the room. I don't know if I should follow, I don't really know what to do with myself. I put on some clothes and when I'm about to walk out I hear her asking me to come downstairs. I obey and join her on the couch. 

  


"Eliza do you love him?" 

"No absolutely not" 

  


I see my wife being really serious and deep in her thoughts. I feel so guilty and uncomfortable. I stare at her without a word and wait for her to give me orders. 

  


"Do you love me?"

"Yes more than anything" 

"How can I trust you now?" 

"I don't know, if you want me to leave I'll go pack my bags" 

"No. We have to make this work. We are married and you fucked up. I can't loose you Eliza but I need time to heal." 

"I understand" 

  


I touch my stomach and wonder what I should do with that part of the story. Since Alycia left in the morning I've been in bed wondering what I should do and I can't make up my mind. I know I'm in no space to ask anything but I need to.

  


"Do you want me to go to a clinic tomorrow and get..." 

"Don't say it. You are having this baby Eliza" 

  


I can't really wrap my head around the idea of being a mom and the current situation. I try to reach out my hand to Alycia's but she moves it away. I watch her get up and take her stuff from our bedroom and moving it to the guest room downstairs. I don't move from the couch until she finally stops in front of me. 

  


"For now I would like to sleep alone and not really have any type of physical contact with you."

"I understand, if it's what you want" 

  


I keep a straight face and drag myself upstairs, once in the room I collapse into the bed. I bite down on the pillow to hide my screams of pain. She shouldn't even be here, she should leave me and ask for a divorce. Despite what I've done she's still there, fighting for us when I am the one that should be fighting for her. I promised to make it up to her when I treated her like shit and I'm still doing so. After several hours of crying I hear a knock on my door. I swipe away my tears and hide the tissues under the bed, who am I going to fool?

  


"I brought you something to eat" 

"Thank you, you shouldn't have" 

  


Alycia brings me a bowl of soup she made and sits next to me on the bed. I stare into her eyes for the first time since this morning. She starts crying. 

  


"It's hard Eliza, It's fucking hard. I want to hate you but I've spent the afternoon listening to your screams, it felt like someone was breaking every bone in your body. It's the worst thing to hear. I never want to hear that again."

  


I look down ashamed and put the bowl aside. I want to swipe away her tears but once more she moves her head backwards. 

  


"No don't" 

"Sorry it's...a reflex" 

  


I see on her face how deeply I hurt her and it's unbearable. She finally leaves my room. I drink the soup and call the doctor to make an appointment as soon as possible. 


	5. Reality check

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey readers ! I'm back at University now so I'll try to find regular posting days for the two current fan fics (Hand in hand and this one). I hope you like this chapter, Alycia finally get's some kind of payback ;)

**Eliza's POV**

  


"Please come inside"

"What's going on why did you... Oh hi Alycia I didn't know... I mean I..." 

"Cut the crap and sit" 

  


I find it difficult to swallow in this tension. My former friend Rhys sits next to me on the couch. Alycia in front of us, a dark cold stare petrifying me. She wanted to confront both of us and tell Rhys about the news. 

  


"So how was it to fuck my wife?" 

"I... how do you..." 

"How do I know? Well my dear wife has at least some bit of conscious left and told me" 

  


I'm use to be treated like that for the past week, I deserve it anyways. I stare at the floor only wanting this to be over. 

  


"So Rhys, tell me why you did that? Do you love her?" 

"I don't. I was drunk I can barely remember anything from that night" 

"No love then good. Eliza I think you have something to tell him?"

  


Rhys turns his head my way, when I cross his stare I see he's completely lost. I take a deep breath, one last stare at Alycia but she doesn't back down from Rhys. 

  


"Rhys I went to the doctors a couple of days ago and he confirmed that... I'm pregnant" 

"It's mine?" 

"I will ask you to be careful with your words Rhys, I'm still mad at her but I love her and if you imply once more that she slept around I'm going to kick you in your small penis brain." 

  


I never saw Alycia so serious about something; I don't want to hear his answer. I stare at her in hope that she will come and hug me but I know it won't happen. 

  


"Eliza I'm sorry" 

  


Rhys get's up and starts walking towards the front door but Alycia stops him before he can get out. He turns around and she hits him in the face. 

  


"That's for fucking my wife. You can leave now but don't ever come back near her I think you have done enough" 

  


I try to control my emotions but my sensitivity is so high that it's practically impossible not to cry every five seconds. The door slams, Alycia comes back in the room. She's still red of anger and I see her hands are shaking. 

  


"Thank you"

"Don't thank me. He is a dick and I never want you to see him again. He doesn't want his child fine you'll raise it on your own." 

  


Those words hurt me even more. Alycia is clearly not including herself in this process; she doesn't want to be a part of this. If Rhys and her do not want this situation then I'm not having it. 

  


"Alycia can you call the clinic and make an appointment for tomorrow, I made my decision" 

  


**Alycia's POV**

  


"Alycia can you call the clinic and make an appointment for tomorrow, I made my decision" 

  


I never assumed she would want to abort this baby. I guess it's the right decision, Rhys is clearly against it. I call and get her the first appointment in the morning, I also call a cab to drive there and back. Eliza leaves me, I guess she's headed to her room. I do the same thing and crash into my bed. I close my eyes for a second and fall asleep deeply.

  


_"Babe please be careful!"_

_I can't believe I'm finally holding him, his cute little cheeks, his tiny fingers wrapped around my index. Eliza is starring at me concern I'm going to fail and hurt our baby. I stare at this small human in my arms and realize how complete I feel. I lay him in his crib before getting closer to my wife._

_"Thank you for bringing to the world one more reason for me to love you even more"_

_"I love you"_

  


I wake up in choc, tears on my face. This dream felt so real, I feel confused and upset because it all vanished away. I get up and head to the kitchen to drink some water, it's the middle of the night but I see light coming from Eliza's room. I shouldn't feel like this but I need to see her. This dream completely changed my mind about the situation. I walk up the stairs two by two and push open the door. She's standing up in front of the bed, she turns around surprised to see me awake and in her room at 3 a.m. 

  


"Alycia? What's going on?" 

  


I walk up to her and in the same movement I grab her close and kiss her lips. She takes a moment before letting go. I deepen the kiss and take her to the bed. I bite down on her neck and collarbone; I drag my hands up her thighs and lift her shirt over her head. I undress myself and bring back our lips together. I feel her hands settling on my neck, holding me tight. I stare into her eyes for a second, I see she does not really understand what's happening, I can't really tell either but I just know I need this. I kiss her lips once more before dragging my lips down her neck, chest, I stop right before kissing her stomach. I stare back at her eyes and I see her face expression changing, she's concerned about my next move. I smile softly at her and gently kiss her belly. I drag myself further down and kiss her center. Eliza starts moaning, I continue my actions holding her legs down. I play with my tongue on her and I feel her arousal growing, I don't need much time before she caves completely into the pleasure. I pull myself back at her face level. She's having trouble breathing, I lay my head next to hers. 

  


"I... Love...you but.... why?" 

"Eliza I want this baby... It's your decision to make, I'll respect it but you need to know I want to have this baby with you" 

  


I see a bright smile illuminate her face; she jumps over me and kisses me over and over again. I stop her for a second and push her back on her side. 

  


"That doesn't mean I forgive you, I still need more time"

"Than what was this?" 

  


Her beautiful face is distracting me from my values, I want to pretend nothing happen but when I see her I still see Rhys. For a minute I thought I could be okay but I'm still not. I get up and grab my clothes on the floor. 

  


"I'm sorry, it won't happen again not until I'm okay" 


	6. Twelve weeks

**Eliza's POV**

  


Before I cross another day out of the calendar I see written in red ink that I have an appointment with the obstetrician for an ultrasound and check up on the baby's health. I also have an audition right after that. My first real audition in months, I didn't expect to be pregnant the time it was schedule, I don't even know if I should go. I feel a warm breath down my neck; Alycia is standing behind me reading over my shoulder. 

  


"We should leave in about ten minutes if we don't want to miss this appointment"

"I completely forgot about it and also the audition" 

"How can you forget the 12 weeks marker? And don't make that face you are also going to that audition" 

  


I guess my face spoke my mind. Alycia has been progressively getting closer to forgiveness. At least she doesn't treat me like I'm nothing anymore. This unexpected pregnancy has brought out something I never saw in her before, I can't quite tell what it is yet but I like it. We get into the car and drive silently to the doctors’ office. 

  


"Welcome back Miss Taylor-Carey, make yourself comfortable we will start soon" 

  


My doctor leaves the room. I stare at the ceiling and I can't help but feel nervous. I feel Alycia's fingers wrapping around mine. 

  


"It's going to be okay, I'm sure everything is fine" 

"You think?" 

  


She gets up and stands next to the bed, she brushes away the hair on my forehead before kissing it. She stays close to me, my heart start accelerating, our lips get closer and our eyes meet. I close my eyes but a violent bright light forces me to cringe. 

  


"So 12 weeks is that correct?" 

  


I realize Alycia is back on her sit and the doctor is the one standing next to me now. 

  


"Have you been feeling any disturbing feeling or anxiety?" 

"No, I'm fine" 

"Are you sure? Your pulse is quite fast."

  


I'm glad she deemed the light because I'm getting really red. I stare at Alycia and I'm sure I can read a "sorry" on her lips. The doctor lifts my shirt and starts rubbing a really cold gel on my stomach. 

  


"Let's see how this baby is doing" 

  


A strange picture appears on her monitor, I can't really see anything. Alycia comes closer to me, I grab her hand. We both stare at the small screen like we're staring at a piece of art that we don't understand. The room is completely silent; I've never wanted a doctor to speak so much than today. I stare at her and she frowns her eyebrows, she looks closer and stops moving her hand. I knew something was wrong. 

  


"Something’s wrong?" 

"Don't worry Miss Carey everything is fine. Look here is your baby" 

  


I feel Alycia's hand squeezing mine. I follow the doctor’s finger on the screen as she indicates where to look. At first I can't see anything than I discover his strange head and tiny legs, the doctor turns the sound up and we can hear his heart beat slowly. I can't believe my ears and eyes, this is inside of me. 

  


"I'm going to print those for you and the file, I'll be back in five minutes" 

  


Doctor Gill leaves the room once more. I can't take my eyes off the screen it's so beautiful. I feel a small drop on my cheek; I stare over me and see Alycia crying. 

  


"Hey don't cry or I'll start crying"

"It's just so... perfect" 

  


I swipe away her tears, she doesn't push me away. I stare back at he monitor and realize my life will never be the same. After we finish completing the documents, we drive back home. I drop my bag on the counter. Alycia is straight behind me, she locks the door before turning around suddenly. 

  


"Shit Eliza your audition we completely forgot!" 

"I didn't" 

"What?" 

"I don't want to go, I don't need to go" 

"Why?" 

"I have everything I need" 

  


Alycia comes closer to me, she puts her hands on my waist. She has been getting closer to me lately but never that close. 

  


"Work would be good for..." 

"I don't need work Alycia, I have a beautiful nearly finish house, a wonderful wife that I don't deserve and a baby on the way. I don't want a role in a movie or in a show, I want you and this." 

  


**Alycia's POV**

  


I finish my cup of coffee on the patio; I look at the wood on the floor and wonder who will be able to fix our house. I join Eliza in the kitchen and see she's facing the calendar on the fridge; I look over her shoulder and check the time on my watch. 

  


"We should leave in about ten minutes if we don't want to miss this appointment"

"I completely forgot about it and also the audition" 

"How can you forget the 12 weeks marker? And don't make that face you are also going to that audition" 

  


Eliza has been doing everything to please me for the past weeks. I understand why she's doing it but it doesn't make anything easier. Yes she hurt me but at the same time I'm tired of holding back. I grab the car keys and drive us to Doctor Gill a private OB near us, no one knows about Eliza's pregnancy except Maia and Marny so we are still hiding it. As Eliza settles on the long chair I see she's getting nervous. I come closer and grab her hand slowly, she stares at me. I try to reassure her and kiss her forehead, I stay close to her and without noticing I end up facing her, my lips part and my head leans in. The door opens up the door completely which brought me back to my sit. She starts asking lots of questions to Eliza about her health, I only start listening carefully when she starts the ultrasound. 

  


"Let's see how this baby is doing" 

  


I stare at the screen, holding Eliza's hand to comfort her and myself. Nothing appears, only strange lines, no sounds. I feel my heart rate getting higher, I don't feel confident anymore. What if something happened? What if she lost the baby? After waiting a long five minutes I can't hold back my tongue. 

  


"Something’s wrong?" 

"Don't worry Miss Carey everything is fine. Look here is your baby" 

  


I exhale loudly; maybe too much by the stare the doctor gave me. I stare back at the monitor and realize there's actually a strange form, I look closely and I can see what resembles a head, body and legs. I'm still worried about the sound but before I can say anything doctor Gill turns a big button around and I can hear a heart beat, it's soft but it's real. 

  


"I'm going to print those for you and the file, I'll be back in five minutes" 

  


I don't even see her leaving the room I'm too in shock. After all we've been through as a couple, as a married couple I never expected our lives to change that much. I'm so grateful for this gift, I hate how it happened but I love the outcome. I let a tear drop. 

  


"Hey don't cry or I'll start crying"

"It's just so... perfect" 

  


I keep close to me the pictures of our baby, I already know how I'm going to announce it to my parents. I know they will ask for details about how it happened but I just won't tell them about that. We drive back home, after all these emotions I'm deeply into my thoughts when it hits me. 

  


"Shit Eliza your audition we completely forgot!" 

"I didn't" 

"What?" 

"I don't want to go, I don't need to go" 

"Why?" 

"I have everything I need" 

  


I instantly come closer to her, after today I don't want to hold back what I want to do. I don't think I will ever forgive her completely but I can't spend the rest of my life wondering how it would have been like not to push away happiness because of a mistake. I also want Eliza to be happy and I know she's been miserable since she did it, she's carrying our future and she deserves to be happy. 

  


"Work would be good for..." 

"I don't need work Alycia, I have a beautiful nearly finish house, a wonderful wife that I don't deserve and a baby on the way. I don't want a role in a movie or in a show, I want you and this." 

  


I stare deeply into her eyes and for the first time in a while I see love, I feel how much she means what she's saying, she's not saying it for me, it's honest and real. I grab her face and kiss her lips. When we part I decide it's time for me to try and move on. 

  


"I love you Eliza Jane" 


	7. Coming out

**Alycia's POV**

  


"Babe?" 

  


I stare at Eliza, she standing in front of the fireplace. She doesn't turn around the first time I call her. 

  


"Eliza?" 

"Yes?"

"I'm going to call my mom on Skype, are you ready?" 

  


I press the green icon, I sit comfortably on my chair and when Eliza is next to me I grab her by the waist. I have the pictures from the ultrasound on the table. I feel my wife shivering next to me, I know she's nervous, I don't think she realizes I am too. Finally the call is picked up and my beautiful mother appears on the screen. 

  


"Hey Mom! How are you? Can you see us?" 

"Yes I can darling, you two look so cute !" 

  


Eliza stares at me, she didn't hear what my mom said and honestly I can't hear her well either because of the noise around her. 

  


"Mom where are you?" 

  


She turns her camera around and I discover that she's having a barbecue with Lucinda, Pat and Riley. I feel Eliza getting shakier and warmer under my touch. Her family is waving at the camera and I wave back, Eliza stays in choc. 

  


"Wow! It's actually good that everyone is there... we have an announcement to make"

  


I stare at Eliza but she doesn't move. We rehearsed what we where going to say and it's her time to talk but no sound comes out. She's standing, starring at the screen as if she saw a ghost. I whisper slowly to her. 

  


"Eliza please pull yourself back together" 

  


After several seconds that seems hours to me Eliza finally speaks. 

  


"Yes... Big news, good news for us and hopefully good news for you." 

"It's getting exciting! Tell us we are listening!" 

  


I grab the ultrasound pictures on the table and lay them on my laps. I take a deep breath hoping they won't ask too many questions. 

  


"We are going to have a baby" 

"Yes, I'm pregnant" 

The barbecue assemble stays quite for a couple of seconds before Riley finally breaks the horrifying silence. 

  


"Gosh it's amazing! I always wanted to be an auntie!" 

"I don't know what to say... I'm suprised, I think I'm going to cry" 

"Me too"

  


Both of our moms start crying and hugging each other. I feel stressed out. 

  


"Are you crying because you are happy?"

"Of course! Alycia you are going to be a great mother, but you are growing up too fast"

"Eliza I told you I didn't want to be a grandma young but I take it back, I can't wait to meet this little human" 

  


I show them the pictures trying to hold back my tears; Eliza's brother starts making jokes about the baby's head. 

  


**Eliza's POV**

  


I stare at the shelf above the fireplace; I just finished placing all of our pictures. I caress my still not showing belly and think about the next picture I'll put up there. Probably a family picture after our baby is born. 

  


"Eliza?" 

  


I thought I heard her call me but I'm so not use to her calling me "babe" anymore. I join her at the table and see she's about to call her mom. We repeated several times before today what we should say and how but I don't feel ready. I see her mom appear on the screen and I loose my confidence even more. I hold onto Alycia's shoulder because I'm afraid to fall on my knees. I can't hear what her mom says and when I realize why I feel panicked inside. My mom, sister and brother are there and waving, happy to see us, for the first time I'm not happy to see them, I was not prepare to tell them. 

  


"Wow! It's actually good that everyone is there... we have an announcement to make"

  


I stare at the screen but I'm unable to speak, I just want to run away. What if they ask how it happened? Why we decided to have a baby? When it happened? So many questions go through my mind. 

  


"Eliza please pull yourself together" 

  


Like a mechanic robot I finally answer Alycia's prayers. 

  


"Yes... Big news, good news for us and hopefully good news for you." 

"It's getting exciting! Tell us we are listening!" 

"We are going to have a baby" 

"Yes, I'm pregnant" 

  


The words finally came out but I don't feel that relieved. I'm patiently waiting for their reactions; I can see they all stare at us in choc. 

  


"Gosh it's amazing! I always wanted to be an auntie!" 

"I don't know what to say... I'm suprised, I think I'm going to cry" 

"Me too"

  


I stare at Alycia and I see in her eyes how scared she is but after confirmation it's happy tears I see on my wife's face how relieved and peaceful she feels. I'm still not feeling that well, it's a lot to carry on your shoulders, I still feel ashamed. I know Alycia kind of forgave me but I didn't forgive myself yet. I let her finish the call alone, she stares at me but I guess by my face she knows what's going on. I walk upstairs to our bedroom, I lie on the bed and squeeze Alycia's pillow next to my nose. I let the tears flow silently as I think about what I have done. After a couple of minutes I ear the door opening and a weight next to me. 

  


"Eliza... What's going on?" 

  


She caresses my arm and takes the pillow away from my face; I nod sideways and let the tears flood my face once more. Alycia comes closer and takes me in her arms. 

  


"Babe I'm here"

"I'm sorry" 

"Eliza stop being sorry please you sound just like Clarke in season three" 

  


I let go of a small laugh, I missed our "The 100" references. She smiles softly, with her index she stops a tear from crashing on my lips. 

  


"I have a tiny surprise for you but for that you need to stop crying and put something less...comfortable on" 

  


I slap her shoulder but obey. I need to get out of here she's right. I have no idea what her surprise may be but I'll follow her anywhere. 


	8. Princess Mechanic

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you don't mind that I didn't do Alycia's POV at all in this but replaced it by Lindsey's...Promise it's not going to happen again, I'll stick to Eliza and Alycia O:)  
> By the way in this chapter there's a description of Alycia's outfit and I wrote this a week ago and just realized that it's exactly what she was wearing today during the second day of the convention in Copehangen... Maybe I'm a psychic ;)

**Lindsey's POV**

  


"Lindsey?" 

  


I turn around as I ear my name. Eliza has a bright smile on her face, she runs towards me. I stand up and hug her as soon as she's in my arms. I missed her chubby face. Alycia is starring from the distance, she organized all this. I nod at her with a smile and she leaves us. Eliza sits across the table, I booked our favorite restaurant for lunch I knew she would like it. We use to come here all the time before meeting up with the crew for meetings. 

  


"So babe tell me everything! You've been so silent lately..." 

  


Eliza looses her smile and starts pressing her finger against the sharp edges of the fork. I stop her hand with mine. I try to reassure her with a stare. 

  


"What I'm about to tell you will probably change your vision about me and..."

"Eliza just tell me. You are my friend and I've missed you" 

"I'm pregnant" 

  


I try not to look too much in choc by her announcement. She never told me she wanted to be pregnant or that Alycia desired children. Eliza doesn't seem that hyped about the news. 

  


"You never told me you and Alycia were trying to..."

"I cheated on her Lindsey. I slept with Rhys one time when I was drunk" 

"You don't need to explain yourself Liz. We all make mistakes, if Alycia managed to forgive you you should forgive yourself. " 

  


Alycia told me on the phone that Eliza was pretty depressed about something, this pregnancy should be a great experience not a sad one. 

  


"Anyways...I also have some news..." 

"Yes enough about me, tell me!" 

"This beautiful gal is now taken" 

"What about Princess Mechanic? I'm so disappointed" 

"Sorry babe... And you actually know who it is..." 

"It's Ricky isn't it?" 

  


I start blushing. She knows me way too well. She starts laughing at my embarrassment. 

  


"Lindz it's amazing! Well honestly I never pictured you with him but girl you post way too much picture of you two on socials" 

"Excuse me if we are invited at the same events..." 

"Yeah right like the event that took place in your house last night? I recognized the furniture" 

  


**Eliza's POV**

  


We eat our lunch and I hear everything about how Ricky treats her like no men has ever done before. She tells me everything about her new job, which leads us to talking about The 100. 

  


"I miss working with everyone" 

"I miss it too Liz but let's face it... since Jason made the decision to kill off Lexa and Lincoln the show never recovered" 

"True... I just miss working sometimes" 

"What obstacles do you have? You are crazy talented I'm sure any director would be happy to have you"

  


I smile at her; I know she's right. I have nothing holding me back from working, only myself. Lindsey never doubted me and always pushed me when she knew I was unsure. We finish our nice reunion and once outside I see Alycia coming towards us. 

  


"Congratulations Leesh you are going to be the sexiest mom on the planet" 

"Hey what about me?!"

"You too honey but I mean look at your wife" 

  


Lindsey is right, I stare at Alycia and she's wearing skinny jeans and an oversized white shirt with a lot of cleavage, her shoulders and back showing. Her hair is up in a ponytail and her make up is subtle, she looks beautiful. On the ride back home, I stare at the sun starting his journey down the horizon, I stare at my wife and smile content with this day. I start realizing that what matter is now and not the passed. Alycia is concentrated on her driving she doesn't realize how deeply I'm starring at her, how I'm feeling the urge to kiss her. When she finally stares at me I bite down on my lower lip. 

  


"Eliza... Don't... do that" 

  


I see in her stare that she wants me as bad as I want her. The red light turn green and after several honks she has to start the car again and stare at the road. She parks the car and as soon as our seatbelts are undone I dive on her side and kiss her passionately. The structure of the car is really not comfortable but the urge was more powerful. I don't know how but we manage to get out. She pushes me on the hood of the car and bites down on my neck, I moan slowly when I realize that our neighbors can see us. I push her back and drag her to the porch where I slam her against the front door. I suck on her lower lip, she grabs my neck vigorously to drive the kiss has she wants it. She lets go of one hand to unlock the door somehow. In one breath we are in our garden, hidden from any curious stares. Alycia is being careful with me even if I feel her desire, I don't spare her and as soon as she's close again I push her against the French door. 

  


"Eliza slowly you are going to break the glass" 

"I don't care" 

  


Her stare is dark and powerful. I capture her lips and let her undress me. I rip off her shirt and at the same time she takes off her jeans. I untie her beautiful gold brown hair and grab her hand. She pulls me close but I resist. She throws a interrogative stare at me, I drag her near the pool and let go of her hand. I enter the warm water and dive. When I finally emerge from the water I stare at my wife with lust. She takes off her underwear and enters slowly the pool. The light from the sun setting is making the view even more perfect. I look at her, at her beautiful body getting covered by the water. She walks towards me and when I can reach her I pull her close. 

  


"You look beautiful" 

  


She answers me with the most passionate and loving kiss ever. We both drown in our love and desire for each other. 

  



	9. Back to work

**Alycia's POV**

  


I write down my last notes about the movie before sending the email to the producer. I've been working on this project for the last year and it's strange to see it coming to an end. The premiere is in three months, the movie is nearly finished and I couldn't be more proud of it. Season six of Fear The walking dead is about to start, I close my laptop and sit comfortably on the couch. 

  


_\- Guess who is watching Fear tonight?_

_\- Hey Leesh! How is life? Your movie?_

_\- Good, great. You have to come over soon babe xx_

_\- Don't worry; I finish the finale tomorrow, so wait for me xx_

  


I stare at the last text from Mercedes with a smile. I miss working with her; she's the only survivor from the original cast. I watch my friend killing zombies one after one and slowly I feel my eyelids getting heavier and heavier every minute. I cave into sleep slowly, letting go of this hard day of work. 

  


"Alycia..." 

  


I open my eyes slowly and feel a soft caress on my forehead, when my vision finally becomes clear I see Eliza's face above me. Her smile is contagious, I reach for her face, and she kisses me. 

  


"You fell asleep on the couch again, come on, let's put you in bed" 

  


Eliza walks around the couch to help me out, she reaches for my hands but I don't get up. Instead, I pull slowly on her hands so she's the one that has to sit down next to me. I'm careful with my strength; her belly is starting to show. 

  


"I don't want to sleep right now, tell me about your day instead" 

  


She unties her shoes and takes off her jacket before nesting next to me under the blanket. I kiss her forehead and caress her belly above her shirt. 

  


"Well, it was very fun, I finally feel back at home on set. I mean, I'm not stressed out anymore" 

"That's good, and do you know how long they are keeping you?" 

"Not really, I guess until they can't hide the fact that I'm pregnant" 

  


This new job allowed her to think about something else than what she did and this baby. I run the palm of my hand on her belly button when I feel a small kick. We both jump surprised. 

  


"Was it..?!" 

"Yes babe..." 

  


I lift her shirt and frenetically start kissing her belly. 

  


  


**Eliza's POV**

  


"Are you working tomorrow?" 

"No, I have an appointment with the OB. We are finally going to know the sex of the baby" 

"You will have to tell me when you come back" 

"I will promise" 

  


I pick up my bag at the door of the trailer and walk down towards the parking lot. The sun is setting; I stare at the studios and sets and take a deep breath. I've missed this environment so much. I know it's a temporary role on a sitcom, but it's work and it's just what I needed. I wave to some of my co-workers and head towards my car. I shortly realize someone has stopped walking when they saw me. I frown my eyebrows and put my hand over my forehead to see who that person is. The familiar silhouette walks towards me but I still can't see who it is. When he is close enough I loose my smile. 

  


"Eliza..." 

"You shouldn't be here" 

"I work here too okay, I'm not stalking you"

"Rhys... what do you want?" 

  


I unlock my car and open the door but he comes in between. I don't know what to say or how to act around him. Alycia has been clear about what she wanted; it's been nearly four months since I saw him. 

  


"I just want to know how you are" 

"I'm fine, can I go now?" 

"You are working again, it's great" 

  


I push his hand and put my stuff on the passenger seat, I take off my jacket and I see his face changing. My shirt is skin-tight and I quickly make the connection. 

  


"Eliza tell me you gained weight" 

"Walk away please..." 

"I can't believe it you kept our baby..." 

  


I feel my rage and nerve bursting in my body, I really want this conversation to be over and to be close to my wife. 

  


"You walked out on me, you were my best friend and you let me... Why didn't you push me away? Don't answer that you know what just walk away. It was never our baby. I don't want you involve in his life, Alycia and I are going to raise him together and we don't need you so just forget about me." 

  


I leave him on the parking lot and drive away. I don't feel sad or angry with myself anymore. I carefully drive back home, feeling free from all this drama that has been going on for the last months. When I enter the house, walk into the living room expecting to find my wife working on her computer but instead I see her peacefully asleep on the couch. I silently walk up to her and caress her cheek, nose and forehead softly. 

  


"Alycia..." 

  


She opens up her eyes slowly; her groggy face is so cute that I can't help but smile. I kiss her lips. 

  


"You fell asleep on the couch again, come on, let's put you in bed"

  


I try to help her out but she doesn't move. I don't fight her on this; I actually just want to cuddle with her. I take off my shoes and everything that's too restrictive. I sit next to her and rest my head on her shoulder. I tell her how my day went and before I can talk about Rhys the baby kicks. It's not the first time but we still get surprised about it. Alycia starts kissing my belly, her soft lips tickles me so I giggle but I slowly regain my serious. 

  


"I saw Rhys..." 

  


She stops everything and throws and intense stare at me. 

  


"He saw I was pregnant, I told him I didn't want to see him again and that we didn't need him" 

"Good... if he ever comes back I..." 

"I know you will kill him... I don't want to think about him or talk about him" 

  


I take her hand and place it on my stomach; I force her to focus on something else. She kisses my cheek and we spend the next hour watching TV and feeling the baby move. 


	10. Addictions

**Eliza's POV**

  


I bite down on her neck before scratching her back from her shoulders to her behind. She moans in my ear and takes my lips between hers. 

  


"Eliza three times today is enough... I have work to do" 

"Please one more time" 

  


She laughs at me and sits on the bed before putting back her shirt. 

  


"No, and I'm not even sure it's healthy for the baby" 

  


I stare at my 6 months belly and the hickeys that Alycia did just underneath my breast. I place my hand over it and feel the movements of our child. We didn't want to know the gender so we are stuck calling it "the baby" but I have a feeling it's a boy. Alycia has been working every day and night for the last week to prepare for the movie premiere. I'm invited but she doesn't want me to be pressured or stressed by the press. I stare at my wife's butt in her sexy underwear barely hidden by her long shirt and I feel the urge to make love to her again. Those hormones are driving me crazy. 

I head downstairs shortly after her and open the fridge where I only see vegetables. 

  


"Babe are you serious... When I said 'do the groceries' I didn't mean that" 

"Look at yourself babe" 

  


I stare at my reflection in the entrance mirror and I can agree that I have put on some weight but it's mainly because I have to feed a small human and myself. When I walk pass Alycia I slap her shoulder. 

  


"Are you implying that I'm fat?" 

  


She stands up, leaves her computer to join me next to the counter. She grabs my face and squeezes my chubby cheeks. 

  


"You are not fat you are pregnant and you should be careful about what you eat" 

"I know but I want Nutella" 

  


Alycia smiles and doesn't hold back a desperate breath. I find myself childishly begging for candy, she doesn't show me where she has hidden the Nutella. I kiss her lips with fierce, placing my hand on her behind. She moans and pushes me away. 

  


"No Eliza please don't..." 

  


I shut her up by capturing her lips and pushing her against the counter. She tries to resist me so I block her hands on the marble worktable. I lead my lips down her neck where I kiss her skin passionately. I can feel her pulse beating fast on my lips. My leg almost naturally nest between her open thighs. 

"I really have to work..." 

  


I press my leg higher until I can feel her arousal. My hands are now behind her neck letting her not chance to escape me. I smile when I feel her thighs tightening, I won. 

  


"I officially hate you..." 

  


She takes my hand to drag me to the couch but I hold her back. 

  


"I need to know where's the Nutella first"

"It's in the outside kitchen cupboard" 

  


I put on my best victory smile and only kiss her slowly. 

  


"Thank you, you can go back to work now" 

  


  


**Alycia's POV**

  


Eliza has this mocking smirk on her face; I actually hate her so much I want to kiss her. I watch her disappear in the garden before getting back to more serious work. I clear up my email inbox, check twice my schedule for the premiere. I'm scared about it; all the serious directors are waiting for what the young Aussie actress has done. When I'm about to close my inbox window I receive a curious mail. 

  


_"Please Alycia read this"_

  


I think twice before tapping on it. The email address is not familiar. 

  


_" Alycia,_

_Before you delete this email please read it._

_It's Rhys, I know you told me to stay away and I will. I just want you to know I'm sorry, I realize now that Eliza needed a friend not a drunk ass. Don't blame it on her, blame it all on me._

_This baby is yours, I will never try to claim some rights but if you ever need help I'm willing to be there financially or physically..._

_I wish you all the best for your movie and for this new adventure._

  


_Rhys."_

  


After reading several times this email I finally delete it. Why does he think a letter will make me feel any better about him? The thought of him sleeping with Eliza crosses my mind again; I shake my head trying to make this image disappear when I feel a cold hand on my arm. 

  


"Your head is exploding?" 

"I guess..." 

  


I close the computer as if I had something to hide but Eliza is way too busy eating to notice. I take the Nutella pot out of her hands and look into it. It was full and only a small quarter is left. 

  


"Seriously babe?!" 

"What?" 

  


I notice she has chocolate all over her lips as I watch her lick her index clean. Before she can put another finger in her mouth I grab her hand and stick her finger in my mouth. I caress it with my tongue, the taste of chocolate making all my anxiety vanish away. Eliza stares at me surprised but I can see in her eyes her lust. 

  


"Are you done with work now?" 

  


I know what she has in mind; lately it's all she wants after eating of course. I kiss her passionately and let her drag me upstairs to our bed. 


	11. The premiere

**Alycia's POV**

  


"Alycia look here please!" 

"Maia on the side please!" 

  


The photographs are making me blind. I'm glad Maia is standing next to me to catch me if I fall. The whole cast and crew is here walking the red carpet. Once I finished all of the pictures I head over to the journalists and find myself separated from my best friend. 

  


"So Alycia tell us... how do you feel about your big night?" 

"It's amazing! A dream come true." 

"Congratulation on the movie and on the future baby... how is Eliza? We haven't seen her around?" 

  


I smile at the journalist and I expected some questions about my personal life so I answer them calmly. 

  


"Thank you. Well, she is doing great and she's actually inside the theater waiting for me, that's why I should hurry!" 

  


I escape inside the building. My manager tells me I should've stayed longer and answer more questions but I disagree. I enter the theater and before I can get to my seat next to Eliza, I bump into Vicky and Marny. 

  


"Babe!! We are so happy for you!" 

"I'm so happy to see you here... " 

"We saw Eliza too, and damn she's getting bigger!" 

"Vicky, that's how you look when you are nearly eight months pregnant" 

"Go and join your wife, I'll explain to Vick the fundamentals of life" 

  


I laugh out loud before continuing my walk to the front row. After getting old back some more by guests I finally end up next to Eliza. She is eating popcorn and doesn't even notice I have arrived. 

  


"Popcorn seriously?" 

"Leeshy! How went the red carpet? It was quick..." 

"Yeah... well they asked more questions about you than the movie so..." 

  


I try not to show my disappointment and not let it influence my mood. Eliza kisses my lips, there's a caramel coating on her lips from the popcorn, which makes my lipstick stick even more to her. I let a giggle escape before swiping her over lip clean with my thumb. The presentation starts, I join my team on stage and take the mic and introduce all the cast. The screening finally starts and I regain my place next to Eliza. I hold my wife's hand during the entire movie, too anxious to do anything else. When the credits start rolling the entire room applauds and cheers which warms my heart and brings tears to my eyes. I stand up and say thank you as much as I can to the crowd. Eliza stands up too, I can see in her stare how proud she is. Her face suddenly changes and she folds in half with a cringe on her face. I throw myself above her and escort her outside. 

  


"Eliza talk to me what's wrong!" 

"I don't.... know. It hurts..." 

"What hurts?!" 

  


She moans loudly, her hands on her belly. Maia joins us and help me get Eliza outside. 

  


"Alycia just go to the hospital" 

"Babe your premiere..." 

"I don't care. Maia please apologize for me to the team" 

"Go!" 

  


The car starts and I hold Eliza's hand. She is squeezing it so hard I don't feel my fingers anymore, I see in her eyes how much pain she's in. 

  


**Eliza's POV**

  


I try to focus my mind on something else than the pain, but it's too hard to contain. I feel strange contractions forcing me to bend and twist myself in every way possible. Alycia is sitting next to me as concerned as I am. The car finally get's to the hospital. My wife steps outside and takes my hand to help me out. Once I'm on my feet I feel dizzy and when my eyes focus again, I see on Alycia's face that she's petrified. 

  


"Oh my god..."

  


I look down and see blood on the floor, on my legs. I force myself not to faint. Alycia screams out for help and doctors run up to me. I let go once on the stretcher. When I wake up I'm in a room filled with doctors and I look around to find my wife but I don't see her. I have an oxygen mask on preventing me from getting heard. 

  


"We have to take her now to the OR" 

"She's only thirty weeks in... It’s risky for the baby" 

"If we don't go she could die"

  


I listen to them powerless; I let a tear stream down my face. I can't feel my body at all. I watch them leave the room. After several seconds wondering what is going to happen to me, I finally see Alycia walk inside. Her makeup is all smudgy and her eyes are red and swollen. She caresses my hair before kissing my forehead. 

  


"Eliza... they are going to take you into surgery, apparently something is wrong with your placenta" 

  


Alycia takes my mask away so I can speak. 

  


"What are they going to do?"

"They will do a C-section and save your life" 

"No." 

I try to stay calm, but I can't control myself right now. The baby is too small. 

  


"The decision has been made..." 

"By who?"

"Me... I don't want you to die Eliza" 

"But you are willing to let the baby die?" 

  


My tone is dry and aggressive, I look away but Alycia turns my head in her direction. 

  


"Eliza Jane Taylor I fucking love you and I can't stand the idea of loosing you." 

  


The doctors walk inside the room before I can answer. My wife kisses my lips and follows the stretcher until she has to stay behind the doors. I stare at the hallway in front of me and feel my heart pounding in my chest; I have never been more scared. I want my baby to live even if that means I won't live to see it. In the OR doctor Gill squeezes my arm. 

  


"We are going to put you to sleep now and I promise I'll do my best to save you and this baby" 

  


I nod a constant stream of tears down my face. I stare at the ceiling for a couple of seconds before falling asleep. When I open my eyes again, the bright light of the room makes me cringe. I distinguish that I'm in a hospital room, I slowly get my memories back, I stare at my hand and see Alycia sleeping on it. I move my fingers and she wakes up. She jumps up and kisses me on every inch of my skin, holding me close to her. I can barely move or speak, but I need to know what happen. I clear my throat.

  


"Tell...me" 

  


Alycia takes a seat next to me and I see on her face all the tears. I look around and see no sign of a crib or baby. I'm waiting for words to come out of her mouth. 

  


"Eliza..." 


	12. Five seconds

**Eliza's POV**

  


"Eliza..." 

  


She paused. She paused during five seconds, the longest five seconds of my entire life. I start crying, she squeezes my hand and takes a deep breath. I just want her to speak, to say that it's over, that we lost the baby that she will never forgive me for this. 

  


"The surgery went well, they took care of the bleeding and saved your life obviously" 

"I don't care Alycia. Tell me about..." 

  


I can't even finish my sentence. I look to the ceiling, I know what she's about to say anyways. 

  


"You want to know about our little boy?" 

  


I stare at her; did I really hear correctly what she just said? Is she just torturing me? She has a smile on her face, but her tears are making me doubt. 

  


"Doctor Gill saved our baby... We have a baby" 

  


I nearly rip off my drip and all the things plugged into me. Alycia throws herself on top of me and burst into tears, I keep repeating frenetically "we have a baby" to make myself believe it's true. My wife kisses me with all of her love. 

  


"He is beautiful..." 

"I told you I knew it was a boy" 

  


I look around once more to check if I missed the crib. Alycia stops me with her touch on my cheek. 

  


"He is... in urgent care." 

"What? Why? What is wrong Alycia?" 

"Calm down... He has ten fingers and toes, his heart is beating but he has trouble breathing on his own for now and eating, they have to make sure he is okay" 

"I want to see him..." 

  


I throw my head back on the pillow and cry some more, my wife wipes away the tears on my face and tries to reassure me. I feel in her tone she's not even sure herself about the faith of our child. The doctor interrupts us. 

  


"I thought I heard some talking in here" 

"Hello doctor, thank you for everything..." 

"Eliza, I'm only doing my job. How are you feeling?" 

"How is the baby?" 

  


She smiles and I can see on her face, she's use to anxious new mothers. After checking all my stats she finally answers my question. 

  


"Your son is in his incubator, fighting. He is strong; I have a lot of faith."

"I want to see him"

"You are still weak, I can't allow you to stand up" 

"Please Doctor... My wife needs to see our child, I promise you she won't get up"

  


She stares at both of us before nodding. She asks for a wheelchair and makes sure that I'm not forcing on my stitches. She allows us ten minutes with him and then it's back to bed for me. I value this opportunity. Alycia pushes me to the pediatric urgent care section of the hospital and we enter the room. The room is quite dark; only one crib is lit up with a violet colored soft light. Once in front. 

  


"This is... our son" 

  


I stare at the massive incubator and see a small human being in the middle, plugged everywhere to tubes and monitors. He is asleep, his small chest moves fast to the rhythm of his breath. I'm amazed. This small baby came out of me, I found myself counting his fingers and toes, checking if every part of his body is in the right spot. 

  


"Does he have hair?" 

  


**Alycia's POV**

  


  


I let giggles escape my mouth, I lean in to whisper the answer in Eliza's ear. 

  


"He is as hairy has a baby could be" 

"He is so small... What if he... doesn't..." 

"He will make it. I know it." 

  


I caress my wife's shoulder and stare at our beautiful son. He seems so calm and peaceful, but I know he is fighting to live. I don't want to alarm or worry Eliza more, but I know the doctors didn't have faith he would survive the first night but he did. He his apparently bigger and stronger than most of premature babies. I wish I could hold him in my arms, but his too weak for now, we can't touch him at all. Doctor Gill said that if the evolution of his condition is normal we should be able to hold him in two weeks. I stare at the door and see Doctor Gill showing her watch. I know Eliza won't want to leave but we have to. 

  


"Babe, I'm sorry, but we have to go now..." 

"No, I don't want to leave him. He needs me." 

"He needs a strong mother, the doctors won't leave his side." 

  


She stares at me before agreeing, before I can turn her chair around she stops me. 

  


"Wait... we have to find him a name" 

  


We never talked about what name we would like; we had this crazy theory that the name will just pop to our mind when we will see the baby. 

  


"We need a strong name" 

"True... he is a little warrior" 

  


For a couple of seconds, we both stare at him and when we finally stare back at each other I know we found the perfect name and with unison we say his name. 

  


"Aden" 


	13. Rollercoaster of emotions

**Alycia's POV**

  


I enter the car and make sure I have everything Eliza asked for. On the way to the hospital, I receive a call. 

  


_\- Hello?_

_\- Hey Alycia, It's Lucinda._

_\- Oh, sorry I'm driving I didn't see the name on my phone._

_\- It's okay. Are you going to the hospital?_

_\- Yes, I'm on my way right now. Are you already there?_

_\- No, I'm stuck at the airport._

_\- I'll pick you up; the traffic is okay, so I should be there in twenty minutes._

  


I take left in the direction of the airport instead of the hospital. Lucinda wanted to come over as soon as she heard Eliza went into surgery, but her daughter as stubborn as she is, didn't want her here worrying. I pick up another call from my agent asking me if I want to start auditioning again, I can't really answer him. I stop on the side of the pavement and get out to help Lucinda with her suitcase. We both enter the car, and I drive back to the hospital. 

  


"How are you holding up?"

"I'm... fine Lucinda" 

"Alycia, you can maybe fool my daughter but not me" 

  


I swallow my tears and try to keep my eyes focused on the road. I answer her with a trembling voice. 

  


"It's hard... Seeing her every day waiting for good news, holding her hands when we have to go back in her room and say goodbye to our son. Drying her tears when I have to leave despite the fact that I want to cry too." 

"I'm here now, it's been nearly three weeks since it happen. You are allowed to break down." 

  


I park the car in my usual spot and show Lucinda the way to Eliza's room. Before we enter I look through the window and see she's napping. She must have spent another rough night. We enter her room and while I take out all the things I brought Lucinda wakes Eliza up softly. I turn around when I hear the crooked voice of my wife. 

  


"Mom?" 

"Hey baby girl" 

  


Lucinda takes Eliza in her arms, I take the opportunity to escape the room and find doctor Gill. I ask at the desk, but they won't answer me, I find a nurse and she tells me that doctor Gill is in urgent care. 

  


"What is she doing there? Is something wrong with a baby?" 

"I can't tell you that, patient confidentiality" 

"Is the baby's name Aden?"

"I don't know, I'm sorry" 

  


I can't think straight, I run in the hallway, ignoring all the people telling me to slow down. When I see the urgent care sign my heart starts beating stronger in my chest, so strong I can only hear that. I throw myself at the window of the nursery where Aden was yesterday and I see an empty room. I check the other rooms and the place seems completely empty, no sign of any doctor. After several seconds looking for anyone to answer me, I finally see a lot of nurses and young doctors coming out of the same room. I wait for all of them to leave before sneaking inside. 

  


"Miss Carey what are you doing here?" 

"Doctor Gill where is my son?" 

  


She can see in my eyes how worried I am, she orders me to calm down and take a sit but I can't, not until she told me. 

  


"Aden is fine, he has been transferred to the pediatric side of the hospital, he is no longer in urgent care" 

"But... The nurse said..." 

"The nurse said I was in urgent care? You jumped to conclusions to quickly. Go back to your wife, I will come by in a couple of minutes to update both of you." 

  


  


**Eliza's POV**

  


"Mom, I didn't expect you to come so quickly..." 

"I could have been here the second you came out of surgery" 

"I'm sorry, it's just..." 

"That you are stubborn and it's okay." 

  


My mom kisses my forehead and caresses my arm. The nurse walks in the room and prepares me before taking out my stitches. I'm glad my mom is holding my hand and being here for that painful moment. The nurse works quickly and leaves the room with her tray. 

  


"So, how are you dealing with the fact that you are a mother now?"

  


I try to smile but my heart is not really in it. Watching my son through a window, not being able to touch him or hold him is not really feeling like being a mother to me. 

  


"I don't know, I never heard him cry..." 

"Eliza be grateful, soon enough you will call me asking how to make him stop" 

  


I let a giggle escape. The door opens and I see Alycia walk inside. She's barely holding the three coffees in her hands, my mom takes one. My wife gives me my dose of caffeine and a small peck on the lips. After I hear everything about my sister recording her first album and my brother starting his last year of college doctor Gill interrupts us. 

  


"Good morning, you must be Eliza's mother? It's good that you are here" 

  


Alycia holds my hand; I look at her and my mom. Something is odd, why would doctor Gill say that. 

  


"I have good news and bad news" 

"Start with the good news, please" 

"Aden is out of urgent care, don't worry, I have a special team watching over him" 

"Can we see him? And hold him?" 

  


My excitement makes everyone laugh in the room. But my question is genuine, I really want to know. 

  


"The other good news is that you will be able to go home today" 

"With Aden?" 

"That is the bad news... Aden must stay a couple of days here, we have to be sure he is stable and good to travel" 

"Then I'm staying" 

  


Alycia looks at me with an angry stare. My mom leaves the room with the doctor, I think she knows we need privacy. 

  


"You need to go home Eliza..." 

"Don't tell me what I need."

  


She get's up nervously and starts walking up and down the room. I can see she's holding back and I hate it. 

  


"Alycia just spit it out." 

"I've been here every day for the past three weeks, holding your hand and comforting you, telling you everything is going to be okay. And not once have you asked how I was, I just miss my wife, I miss you. I need you to come home with me."

  


I get out of bed and take Alycia in my arms, I hold her tight against me, even if I can feel my scar stretching I keep my strength. I kiss her lips and once she's calm again. 

  


"You are right, I will go home with you... I'm sorry" 

"Thank you" 


	14. Home - part 1

**Eliza's POV**

  


Alycia drives me and my mom back home. We haven't been able to see Aden before leaving because he was adjusting and surrounded by doctors. The car ride home is silent, I let myself fall asleep with my head against the window. The door slamming wakes me up, I step outside and try to take a bag from Alycia, but she clearly makes me understand to just get home and not carry anything like the doctor said I should. It's strange to be back home, to smell Alycia's candle again. I take my mom to the pool house where she will be staying. When I get back into the living room Alycia takes my hand. 

  


"I have to show you something, but before you have to close your eyes" 

  


I obey my wife, she drags me up the stairs and down the hall, I can feel the carpet under my feet so I know we are in the baby's area. She makes sure to have her hands over my eyes and her body right behind my back. 

  


"Ready?" 

"Yes?" 

  


She removes her hands from my eyes and I discover what she has done with the nursery. The room's color goes from dark, navy blue, to dark green, forest green and light green and blue on opposite sides. The crib is inside a fake tree that really looks like one. The carpet looks like grass and moss. In the corner, there's a hiding place in a shape of a space ship. 

  


"Do you like it?" 

  


I turn around tears in my eyes and kiss her before answering. 

  


"It's perfect Alycia. Or should I say Lexa?" 

"I was inspired..." 

"Is there anything you can't do?" 

  


She starts thinking, as if my question was serious. I laugh and kiss her once more bringing her mind back to me. I miss being able to kiss her like that. I force myself to let her go. I walk to our room and start unpacking my bag. My mind starts wondering about how Aden is doing, if he is fine or not, if he is back in urgent care, a knot form's into my stomach. Once I'm done, I lay for a moment on the bed and close my eyes. 

  


"Thanks Lucinda! Yes, those are the keys!" 

  


I open my eyes and see Alycia walk inside the room. 

  


"Where is my mom going?" 

  


She lays next to me on the bed and smiles. 

"She's going grocery shopping, I didn't have the time to go" 

  


I nod and stare at her beautiful green eyes. I put my hand on her face and caress her cheek slowly; I've been so preoccupied with Aden that I didn't really pay attention to her. I come closer to her, close enough that our noses are touching. 

  


"I've missed you" 

  


I capture her lips between mine, she answers my kiss and places her hand under my ear. The kiss get's progressively more intense and sensual. I drag my lips down her neck and take a moment to appreciate the taste of her skin and the smell of her hair. I press my lips on her skin once more before she comes over me and takes off her top. I stare at her muscular body. 

  


"Have you been working out?" 

"It's all the painting I've done" 

  


She laughs before diving for another kiss. Our tongue play with each other, we can't stop giggling like teenagers. 

  


  


**Alycia's POV**

  


I take off both of our clothes off. I am very careful when I take off Eliza's pants; I try not to stretch her scar. She hides it with her hand. I stare at her and take both of her hands away before kissing her stomach. 

  


"My stomach is ugly now..." 

"Will you shut up and appreciate the moment, please?" 

  


She bites her lips and nods. I smile and after throwing her a fake annoyed stare I go back to kissing her body. I separate her leg slowly and enter her with one finger slowly while I'm biting slowly on her inner thigh. She moans loudly. I smile even more against her skin. The moment feels special and unique. I accelerate the rhythm and add my tongue to her center. Her breath accelerates; one of her hand is grabbing the sheet and the other one is on her scar. I take that one with my free hand and intertwined our fingers. After a couple of minutes she comes in one long moan where I think she tried to say my name. I pull myself back to her face; I stare at her trying to catch her breath before putting my lips on hers slowly. 

  


"Not helping" 

  


I move away, but she grabs my lips again. 

  


"I didn't say I didn't like it" 

  


I smile against her lips. I pull the covers over us and nest my head against hers. She stares at me and I see in her eyes the tears filling up. 

  


"Baby what is wrong?" 

"I'm just... happy to be home" 

  


For the first time in three weeks I authorize myself to cry in front of her. I let the tears stream down my face as she holds me close to her. I feel her warm body against mine, her hands going through my hair, her skin under my palms, I finally feel home. 

  


"I love you Eliza Jane Taylor-Carey" 

"I love you more my leeshy-loo" 

  


We start talking about how life is going to change now, but for the first time the future seems brighter than ever. I tell her about myagent harassing me about getting back to work and Eliza encourages me to start auditioning again, to get my mind off things and back into my passion. She is right, I promise her I will call my agent tomorrow and settle auditions for next month. Eliza starts rambling around her body. 

  


"How can you desire me...I'm fat" 

"Eliza... I wasn't going to say it but..."

  


She slaps me slowly on the cheek, laughing. 

  


"I told you not to eat that much chocolate" 

"Yes, well, I had my reasons, I was carrying our beautiful baby" 

"You are not fat, and even if you were I love you no matter what"

"Still... I'll call Lindsey tomorrow she will help me" 

  


Lindsey has been asking every day for news about Eliza and the baby, we received so many gifts and letters from fans and friends that I had to store most of it in the storage room next to the garage. The sound of the keys dropping on the counter is our cue to get dressed. 

  


"Lucinda put that bag down I'm coming to help you" 

"Such a brown-nose!" 

  


I put a finger on Eliza's lips before running downstairs to help my mother-in-law. 


	15. Home - part 2

**Eliza's POV**

  


"Mom please let's go!" 

  


When my mother is finally in the car we head to the clinic where the doctor is waiting for us. I'm driving faster than what I should and Alycia's grip on my hand makes me lift my foot from the pedal. I give her a faint smile before apologizing. Alycia and my mom get along quite well now, while I'm rushing to the doctor's office they both share the dream they had over coffee. We all take a seat in the waiting room, my eyes travel from the clock to the door, maybe a thousand times before I finally see her. 

  


"Eliza Taylor-Carey always right on time" 

"Always when it's about my son" 

  


I hear a loud cough behind me. The doctor stares at Alycia standing right beside me and I realize my mistake. 

  


"OUR son" 

"Follow me please" 

  


We've been coming every day since I left the hospital a week ago. Aden has been improving a lot, crying and opening his eyes, but not when we were there to see it. Doctor Gill brings us down the pediatrician section of the hospital to see him, but this time she stops in a room. 

  


"Please make yourselves comfortable I won't be long" 

  


I look at Alycia and she seems as confused as me. My mom has a smirk on her face as if she knew something we didn't. I sit in a rather large chair, the room is bright and there are only big comfy chairs with long armrests. Before I can break the silence in the room the door opens. Doctor Gill is dragging a crib. She takes Aden out and I'm still not talking in shock of what is about to happen. 

  


"Just be careful with his head, put your hand there" 

  


Alycia comes directly over my shoulder while I take our baby in my arms. I can believe I'm holding him, feeling is light weight in my arms. The tears automatically fall from my eyes, my wife makes sure they don't drop on him. I can't recall the moment the doctor left the room. I was too busy staring at this beauty, he is wearing the pyjamas Lindsey and Ricky bought him that said "#Clexamoms". With my free index I caress his small chubby cheeks, trying not to wake him up. I look up to Alycia and see how illuminated is her face. She gives me a peck on the lips before we both go back to staring at him. 

  


"I must say my grandson is handsome" 

  


I try to look less red from all the tears and take the pose with Alycia for the picture. After several minutes I get up carefully and leeshy takes my place. I hand her Aden slowly but he wakes up and starts crying. 

  


  


**Alycia's POV**

  


"You woke him up!" 

  


I scream whisper to Eliza and hold my son for the first time and instantly forget about it. I rock my arms slowly back and forth, adding some "shhh" and he finally calms down. His eyes are wide open, they are bright blue, I guess he got the blue gene from his mother. I can see so many traits from Eliza in him except his dark brown hair. Aden stares at me; I caress his pyjamas and his tiny hands, when suddenly he grabs my index. It's my turn to let the tears stream down my face, I can't believe after all we've been through that he is holding me and that I'm holding him. Eliza is sitting on her mother's lap staring at us with protective eyes. 

  


"You know we've been waiting for this moment a long time" 

  


Of course Aden does not reply to me. His stare is so intense that I can't lock out from it. 

  


"You are a warrior" 

"And you have two proud mothers" 

  


Lucinda puts her hand on my shoulder. I get up and give her the baby, her confidence instantly shows me how much she knows what she is doing and how much we still have to learn. Eliza comes in my arms, I hold her tight. 

  


"We have a baby" 

"We are a family Eliza" 

  


I kiss her lips softly, but Doctor Gill interrupts us. 

  


"So, I see everything is going fine in here. I have some good news for you. Aden has made some amazing progress in the last couple of days and I think he needs his mothers more than the doctors. Before you came we did the car seat test and made sure he was able to travel and he passed it"

"Are you telling us that.... we can bring him home?" 

"Yes Alycia, Aden can go home" 

  


I want to jump around because of the excitement, but I contain myself, I look at Eliza's face and she doesn't seem that excited. 

  


"Are you sure he is ready? Is there any risk for him?" 

"Eliza he is strong, he can eat without tubes and sleep without risking to stop breathing. He is perfectly fine !" 

"Okay"

  


Eliza sighs; Doctor Gill brings us his bag and the car seat we left her. Eliza is concerned he will get cold, so she starts putting all the clothes we had for him on him. I want to laugh, but I hold it in because I know she doesn't find that funny, I just stare at her mom and she can understand me with a simple look. Once he is buckled in the seat he vanishes back to sleep. Eliza and her mom sign all the papers while I go to the car and install the seat safely like the instruction said. I triple check everything. I close the door and make sure it's locked. Eliza and her mom walk towards the car. 

  


"Who drives?" 

"Is it okay if I sit in the back with Aden?" 

  


I let Eliza sit next to him even if I really wanted to, I know she's more anxious than me. I drive the whole family home, it's the first time that I pay so much attention to the road and everything surrounding the car: the signs, the people, the stores, and nature. It brings me back to when I failed my driving test three times, but this time there’s no mistake possible the two most important people in my life are in the car. I park the car in our driveway; Lucinda takes the bags inside while I help Eliza with the baby. I hold our son in my arms and follow Eliza inside. I walk a couple of steps before my wife comes over me, we both stare at Aden, he's fully awake again. Eliza talks to him with the softest voice. 

  


"See, this is your home." 

"Our home" 


End file.
